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As we descend into autumn and its standard accompaniments in the northern hemisphere—pumpkin spice and Christmas music for those wondering—it’s time for your favorite Viola idiot to think spooky thoughts. That’s right, folks. It’s time to think about Fiorentina Halloween costumes.
While this year’s team lacks the hard man of years past (think Felipe Melo or Facundo Roncaglia), there’s still plenty of terror to be had, depending on how you interpret it. Nikola Milenković and Igor, for example, are monstrously large and could probably pull my arms off my body and beat me with them if they wanted. And Bartłomiej Drągowski, of course, is our beautiful and pure blood berserker prince with a heart of gold.
You could also take this in a slightly more abstract direction. For example, you could pick Riccardo Sottil faced with time and options near the opposing box, or José Callejón faced with the prospect of moving forward, or the Dušan Vlahović-shaped void this team may feature up front after January. That’s the joy of being a Fiorentina fan, of course: there are always myriad frights to be had in the team.
Poll
Who’s the scariest Fiorentina player?
This poll is closed
-
7%
Nikola Milenković, the Mountain that Kicks
(9 votes) -
5%
Thighor
(7 votes) -
7%
Bart the Blood Berserker Prince
(9 votes) -
1%
Ravishing Ricky Sottil on the edge of the box
(2 votes) -
21%
Callejón about to receive the ball
(25 votes) -
11%
Vlahović edging towards the exit
(13 votes) -
44%
Those were all jokes because literal violent felon Sasha Kokorin is on the roster
(52 votes)
Here’s your weekend thread. Stay loose.
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