Inspired by Mike-R’s reminiscence about the time he posted a match review that featured the entire Fiorentina as sandwiches (can’t find the link, sadly), we’re going to run that theme back. Not everyone in the squad gets a sandwich because it’s late and my brain isn’t at its most creative when I want to go to bed. Full apologies to anyone who’s left out, and we’re always open to suggestions.
Bartłomiej Drągowski: Maxwell Street Polish—This Chicago delicacy features a kiełbasa topped with grilled onions, yellow mustard, and whole pickled peppers. It took a little while to catch on, but it’s very good and, as you can guess, it is a big thick sandwich.
Martín Cáceres: Cubano—It may seem pretty unremarkable, but it brings the force with two different meats and is at its best when grilled, just as the Uruguayan excels in highest-pressure areas..
Germán Pezzella: BLT—Fully agree with mark@ that the captain is like a BLT. He’s not flashy, and is in fact kind of basic, but you always know what you’re going to get, and it’s always going to be good.
Nikola Milenković: big dang club sandwich—The club sandwich isn’t for the faint of heart, given that its three layers mean it’s a lot heftier than your average sandwich. Add in the crunch of bacon, the bit of mustard and pickles (and maybe some peppers too), and the smoothness of avocado, and you’ve got a Mountain of a lunch.
Luca Ranieri: cheesesteak—There’s no consensus on the best way to get a cheesesteak, but everyone agrees that it’s a dang good sandwich. Whether Luca is a centerback or a leftback and whether he should play in a back three or a back four are questions that may not have answers, but he’s still a dang good defender.
Federico Ceccherini: onigirazu—The man loves his sushi and we’re not going to take that away from him.
Pol Lirola: Bánh mì—These are surprisingly hard to make, as you need the right bread, the right pickles (carrot and daikon), and the right fillings (liver pate and at least one type of pork). It’s pretty easy to have a bad one and write off the genre, but then when it hits, oh man is it excellent. You’ve just got to look around your area until you find the right one.
Lorenzo Venuti: cucumber tea sandwich—Lollo is low-key one of the sweetest, best-natured players in the squad. I dare you to find a photo of him off the pitch in which he doesn’t look like he’s having the best time ever, and we love him for that so, so much. That’s why he’s a perfect match for this light, pleasant, and crustless production.
Dalbert: Eggplant Parmesan—When you were a kid, you loathed eggplant. Even frying it was nasty, and you’d eat anything that was fried. On top of that, seeing it doused with chunky tomato sauce and enormous pieces of mozzarella was enough to make you gag. Then, when you finally tried it, you realized that eggplant parm is actually very good.
Milan Badelj: lampredotto—This slippery delicacy is descended from a very basic peasant food, originally made for and by the poor out of lampreys from the Arno, and it’s probably most appreciated by Florentines; in short, it’s a perfect analog for the midfield maestro. Simple at first glance, but luxurious when you get into it.
Erick Pulgar: chopped beef—The Chilean is a load in midfield and brings an excess of muscle to the engine room. That’s exactly what the finest Texan barbeque sandwich is, too. Powerful, beefy, and oh-so-excellent.
Marco Benassi: the Elvis—You’d think that nobody would combine these ingredients (peanut butter, bacon, banana, pickle), all excellent on their own, into one thing, but on the rare occasion you find someone to make you one, it’s actually pretty good?
Szymon Żurkowski: chicken salad—There are so many ways you can have a really good chicken salad sandwich. It’s lovely in a cold sandwich at a picnic on a warm summer day, and it’s just as good served hot with a cup of soup in the middle of winter. Szymon has played every possible role in central midfield, from regista to destroyer to box-to-box runner to number 10, so he brings just as much versatility. Just don’t put grapes in it, you monsters.
Gaetano Castrovilli: meatball sub—So. Much. Sauce.
Federico Chiesa: Torta Milanesa—Yes, we know he’s actually from Genoa, but this is too appropriate. After all, to get a real Milanesa, you have hammer a pork cutlet very thin, much like the hammering poor Fedetakes every match as he dances past helpless defenders, oozing the luxury of mayonnaise and avocado.
Franck Ribery: Croque Monsieur—As usual, baelfire nailed it here. This French mainstay made its first appearance on a menu in 1910, much like FR7, and has remained the go-to for anyone who wants to be a connoisseur of Gallic excellence, much like FR7. Cheese on both the inside and the outside is a sign of luxury, much like FR7.
Riccardo Sottil: muffuletta—Sicilian by way of New Orleans, its only shortcoming is that it’s often divided into quarters before being sold, leaving you wanting more, more, more.
Rachid Ghezzal: Dyrlægens natmad—I’m going to risk offending the Danish readers here, but much like my knowledge of Rachid Ghezzal, I have no idea what to expect from a Dyrlægens natmad. It is a sandwich, though, so I’m pretty confident that it’s good.
Kevin-Prince Boateng: bagel with lox—A big, solid, cosmopolitan sandwich for a big, solid, cosmopolitan man; both mix robustness and delicacy.
Dušan Vlahović: the Dagwood—The Very Large Teenager is, naturally, a Very Large Sandwich.
Fred: jambon-beurre—Refined yet powerful.
Bobby Duncan: sausage and bacon butty—Basic, yes, but also lethal in large doses; just ask youth teams and cardiologists all over England.
Fiorentina started the week out with a 2-0 win at Atalanta, as long as you don’t count those last 10 minutes. Otherwise, it’s a 2-2 draw marked by a complete defensive meltdown at the back. We’ve got our full coverage here.
We had to wait, but Fiorentina finally got its first win of the Rocco Commisso and Vincenzo Montella eras with a 2-1 triumph over Sampdoria that was sloppy, stressful, and nearly embarrassing but resulted in 3 points anyways.
Andrew_Smith took a deep dive on a little-known figure in Fiorentina’s history who’s one of the world’s all-time greats and oversaw a period of unprecedented success for the Viola.
Hesanka has some thoughts about Vincenzo Montella’s formation choices which are definitely worth a read.
Some fun updates from previous items: Flavio Gori and Sergio Dondoli both got to meet Rocco Commisso, proving that sometimes dreams do come true.
And speaking of dreams coming true, we got our first-ever exclusive interview with a Fiorentina owner, speaking with Rocco Commisso about the racism and discrimination that’s so blatant in Italian soccer, and the big boss minced no words when condemning the retrogressive actions of troglodyte actors.
If you want to read Rocco’s answers to our actual questions in the interview, well, we’ve got those too. And again, it is just amazing that this little website is doing work like this, entirely thanks to Mike McCormack.
Last but very much not least, here’s a look back at that outrageous 18-match Serie A winless streak that now seems so long ago.
Is a hot dog a sandwich?
This poll is closed
This question is terrible.
Comment of the week(ish)
It’s all about the goal celebrations this week. Well done to wolfpackallday and m.atthew for these matching observations.
That’s it for this week, folks. Try baking it instead of frying it.